xiphinema

"Maybe it's that I believe that subconsciously I'm not worthy."
"Or deserving of being happy."
"But, for a long time I've not wanted to be here."
"And there's nothing that I can do, to leave here faster."
"I can't kill myself, I can't."
"It's not that I don't want to."
"It's that I think that I cannot kill myself."
"I've tried multiple times, numerous times."
"And I cannot die, I won't fxcking die."
"Some of me thinks, I live to die, and I want to die."
"Because I want the pain to stop."
"The medication doesn't help."
"The psychiatrists and therapists, they don't help."
"None of it helps."
"None of it helps."